As each day goes, I discover that I am pretty naive. Let me explain why.
I have very humanistic values, I believe that people (humans) are generally good and have good intentions. But as I get older, I realize that this is not always the case. Selfishness and jealousy get in the way, intentions become no longer pure but greedy, and hatred grows inside peoples hearts, whether they realize it or not. I know I have it in my heart too, I get that sinking, ugly jealous feeling, unfortunately it’s become an inherent part of human nature.
It sucks though. Because humans and human nature are destroying the beauty of good for those who still have it in their hearts. Every bit they chip away at the good, it turns into stone until soon, those with good hearts become untrusting, apathetic and cynical. We’re the only race that kills each other out of greed or hate, the only race that tears each other down over skin colour, religion or sexuality, the only race that willingly uses each other until we’re satisfied and move along, like utilizing a kleenex. How could the world have gotten so wrong? What went wrong?
How could a girl suffering with cancer, turn her back and throw away a person — her best friend — who was there supporting her AND her family through all the treatments, her surgeries, recoveries, laughs and tears, without appearing at all fazed? Throw away the person who strived to make her feel normal, even though her world was not normal for her age, or who fought tooth and nail to have some of her dreams come true, or give her a chance at life when the doctors called her palliative? How could someone suffering with something so heavy, do that over nothing (and I mean seriously, nothing) without even the slightest emotion?
If someone could answer that for me, it would be great. Because then maybe I wouldn’t be in this dazed-stunned-post-traumatic paralysis. Because that girl the cancer patient threw away? That was me.
I want to say with love, but more with sadness,
Jo
with love, Jo 